Finding myself in the middle of a PMS spell, I’m hoping that writing about it will turn into a positive coping tool. I’ve tried numerous times to explain to men what exactly happens to me (women) during PMS and I never quite make them understand. Maybe it’s futile but I’m going to give it another shot. Women reading this blog, feel free to add your 2¢’s worth in the comments below.
Let me start by saying, it always catches me off guard. At first I don’t know what’s going on and what’s happened to put me into such a lousy mood. I know “the schedule” so you would think that I’d be prepared but somewhere deep down I guess I imagine that this month everything is going to be okay. That being said, some months are okay which I think is why I get caught off guard when it hits.
First comes “the feeling”. More often then not, it’s a “negative” feeling: frustration, anger, depression, sadness, etc. Nothing happens to bring on this feeling it just appears. Having explained that, understand this; everything that happens following the recognition of “the feeling” feeds into making “it” worse. If you are happy, it makes me feel lousy because I’m not happy. “The Feeling” makes me resent you and your happiness. If you’re miserable, it makes me more miserable because then the world just sucks cuz everyone’s miserable. If you’re quiet then I’m left to fester in my own mire and that never leads to anything good. That’s were I’ve learned to keep quiet. Talking only leads to spurts of venom or ridiculous bout of tears that I usually regret after. The only time talking seems to be okay is if the topic is something we both can be upset or angry about…a mutual hating if you will.
Here are a couple of no no’s when dealing with a woman in this state:
Never rush a PMS’ing woman to get dressed. You must understand that trying to dress during a PMS spell is virtually impossible. Nothing is perfect therefore everything we own sucks and should be thrown away, better yet… burned.
Yesterday I was looking in my closet for about 10 minutes wishing for a tan khaki skirt. Here’s the thing about PMS, if I had a tan khaki skirt in there it wouldn’t have solved the problem, unless it was less that a month old. New is good; old is bad. So I’m staring at the closet and getting deeper and darker into the pit, all the while Gary is merrily dressing only changing his mind once to go from dressy to casual. He asks me why I’m not wearing the top I originally had on and lucky for him (and me in the long run) I have the sense to warn him that I’m swimming in the middle of PMS and it could get ugly. After a sigh, he finishes dressing out of the bedroom.
NEVER ask us what’s wrong. This will only lead to a tongue lashing about how women getting their period is perfectly normal and not something we can control so how can there be anything wrong with it?!!!
Understand that we really don’t have much control over the situation. This is the time when we really don’t have control over our emotions. The rest of the time it’s touch and go at best, but during these spells, all bets are off and the plane is flying by itself.
And as silently as the whole things starts, it goes away. Whether it’s over night and we wake up as if nothing happened, or if it’s from seeing a cute puppy that brings a smile to our face and breaks the spell.
Let me start by saying, it always catches me off guard. At first I don’t know what’s going on and what’s happened to put me into such a lousy mood. I know “the schedule” so you would think that I’d be prepared but somewhere deep down I guess I imagine that this month everything is going to be okay. That being said, some months are okay which I think is why I get caught off guard when it hits.
First comes “the feeling”. More often then not, it’s a “negative” feeling: frustration, anger, depression, sadness, etc. Nothing happens to bring on this feeling it just appears. Having explained that, understand this; everything that happens following the recognition of “the feeling” feeds into making “it” worse. If you are happy, it makes me feel lousy because I’m not happy. “The Feeling” makes me resent you and your happiness. If you’re miserable, it makes me more miserable because then the world just sucks cuz everyone’s miserable. If you’re quiet then I’m left to fester in my own mire and that never leads to anything good. That’s were I’ve learned to keep quiet. Talking only leads to spurts of venom or ridiculous bout of tears that I usually regret after. The only time talking seems to be okay is if the topic is something we both can be upset or angry about…a mutual hating if you will.
Here are a couple of no no’s when dealing with a woman in this state:
Never rush a PMS’ing woman to get dressed. You must understand that trying to dress during a PMS spell is virtually impossible. Nothing is perfect therefore everything we own sucks and should be thrown away, better yet… burned.
Yesterday I was looking in my closet for about 10 minutes wishing for a tan khaki skirt. Here’s the thing about PMS, if I had a tan khaki skirt in there it wouldn’t have solved the problem, unless it was less that a month old. New is good; old is bad. So I’m staring at the closet and getting deeper and darker into the pit, all the while Gary is merrily dressing only changing his mind once to go from dressy to casual. He asks me why I’m not wearing the top I originally had on and lucky for him (and me in the long run) I have the sense to warn him that I’m swimming in the middle of PMS and it could get ugly. After a sigh, he finishes dressing out of the bedroom.
NEVER ask us what’s wrong. This will only lead to a tongue lashing about how women getting their period is perfectly normal and not something we can control so how can there be anything wrong with it?!!!
Understand that we really don’t have much control over the situation. This is the time when we really don’t have control over our emotions. The rest of the time it’s touch and go at best, but during these spells, all bets are off and the plane is flying by itself.
And as silently as the whole things starts, it goes away. Whether it’s over night and we wake up as if nothing happened, or if it’s from seeing a cute puppy that brings a smile to our face and breaks the spell.
Easy come, easy go I say.
2 comments:
Here here sista!
Um, is it strange that everything you mentioned happens to me ALL OF THE TIME?
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